I’m weird with cheese. By that I mean I normally don’t eat cheese because I think it tastes/smells/looks/is gross. I do, however, (normally) like pizza. The pepperoni and sauce sort of balances out the cheese-ness. Since I live in Saint Louis let me clarify that I like standard pizza (think Domino’s on a good day), not gourmet or STL-Style. Never had STL-Style pizza? Read up and decide for yourself. People either love it or hate it from what I can tell.
Because of my weirdness making pizza has always seemed logical. I can have the solid triple meat/normal sauce/light cheese ratio I desire. But homemade pizza also grosses me out. I think it’s the dough. I’m sure some homemade pizza is great but, whatever, I’m a picky little bitch and I don’t like it so there, the end.
I can keep ranting about my cheese issues but I might as well get to the point — I decided to make pizza bagels. Frozen mini pizza bagels are weirdly expensive and the ingredients to make actual pizza bagel are really cheap. Great idea, I know.
This was the happy result of wingin’ it/minor internet research/basing times and temps off of Jack’s Pizza, which we would probably eat five times a week if it weren’t, ya know, awful for you in bulk.
I think they turned out splendidly.
- Plain bagels. The kinds in the refrigerated section are way cheaper and, let’s face it, you don’t need to be fancy when eating a pizza bagel.
- Pizza sauce in a jar. Don’t be a hero and make sauce. You’re eating this on a bagel.
- Shredded mozzarella. We bought the low-fat stuff because that clearly makes this a healthy dinner.
- Toppings, like mini pepperonis and bacon bits (as in the salad topping).
- Garlic powder. However much looks good.
- Parsley flakes, because it makes them look tastier.
- Red pepper flakes. Y’know, if you want a kick of more delicious flavor. Add post cooking. You could probably add it beforehand now that I think of it…
- Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
- Slice the bagels in half and toast lightly to avoid a soggy bagel disaster.
- Spread sauce over bagels, sprinkle cheese, add seasonings, place toppings, etc.
- Bake 10-15 minutes on a foil-lined cookie sheet.
- Let cool or you will burn your fucking mouth on the sauce and it will hurt for weeks. If you’re double pathetic, like myself, you will be burning yourself while eating, know it hurts like hell, and continue eating. Don’t fail like me. Wait.
And ta-da! It has proved to be great quick food, comfort food, and drunk food thus far. Since those are kind of the big three (kidding, sorta) I doubt they need more validation.
Happy bagel-ing to all!